Someone

Is anyone out there???

i dont know what is there left to be done...

i have done wrong...

wrong doings that has no turning back...

doings that can never and should never be forgiven...

yes... i have done that...

i seek forgiveness...and it laid there for me...

i picked it up with a new hope and new start...

terms were the only request...

terms which in return to one whose commited, are not terms...

to those whom not know what love is made of,

would consider these terms hard to follow by...

it is not me,

but i would try...

im sorry i failed even by even taking the first step out...

i dont know what is there left i can do...

please let me go, these are the words i said...

you thought i dont love u no more...

its not true... i do...

its not easy, no it its defo not...

we'll just stop here...

and we'll pick it up again,

if ever this route has a new start...

if i ever see you again...

if things are better,

if you still had me in you,

for i know i will hold on...

then we shall pick it up...

and move on...

now's a bad timing...

i've done wrong...

我的心真的受伤了

对不起

-marg-

numb

All in all,
a pit stop some would call it...

my journey ...
like running water over pebbled ground...

these past few days,
i've commited sins and
here it is, the price im paying...

i've become so numb,

and here comes the song :

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes

Every step that I take is another mistake to you
I've become so numb
I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can't you see that you're smothering me?
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control?
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you

Every step that I take is another mistake to you

and yes, the song continues but i opted to end it right there =)

im sorry for as much as i can say...

i can no longer find myself...
what i've done to myself...
i can no longer look at me again...

im numb and
i will continue walking...

i hope you do well...

-marg-

*giggles*

hi all love,

sorry bout the neglectin blog issue...

ever since i was back in kl, had too much funs of ups n downs,

till i sorta had no time for blog...

now that im back in UK,

well, to be exact, im in Luton now...

town of err..... not so impressing but fair enough to be in...

been about 3 weeks now that im back...

started my first party night out since queensha was back...massive in luton...

my 21st was bashingly amazing...

felt the love, felt the family, felt the friends...

pictures will be updated when time arises...

for now,

i editted a pic of me last night,

our 2nd night out in luton,

back to school themed at legends...

will be keeping this blog active again...

lotsa love...

updates :

5th oct - bedfordshire uni officially starts for me

13th oct - nottingham party at gatecrasher

nov - amsterdamn/netherlands/spain

dec - love lawrence is coming

xoxo,

marg

HERMANO

hey all...

i know its been a long time since my last update =)
im back now in MSIA... been about a month plus or so... will be leaving back in 12 days or so...

reading the title of this post,
yes, im pretty moody thus the negativity of the post title...
feel free to leave since my lamenting has not begun...

never have been so painful,
not even when mum and dad scolded me,
this was more harsh and hurtful...

you said nothing,
you looked nowhere here,
you couldnt care less,
you were so obssess with IT,
you pretended not to see me,
you wished and hoped i wasnt related,
you curse and swear of what i am,

i said you were the best,
i search high and low just to see if you're doing alright,
i seek help and everything just to make sure you're good,
im in love but i am too with you,
i never would neglect you nor dismiss you,
i thank god for you,
i look up to you and learn from you...

all you did was stood by her ...

i wonder at times,
why couldn't we be like before?
was it when you had that curse fallen upon you???
yes, i said curse...

why wouldnt you love me like before?
was it that the love we had was all gone just by one torn???

how could you not care for me?
how could you allow them to have disgust upon me?
how could you not fight for me?
how could you just left me there?

the things i did,
it might all not be right,
i admit...im sorry
the things i said,
it might not be right,
i admit, and im sorry

i tried to do it right,
i said to made things right...
it all seemed too perfect...
mere flawless...
i knew it wouldnt be so easy...
naive, the word they use upon me...
never be too nice , words they return to me...

never could i understand...
why things has to be this complicated...

i hated for a reason...
you were selfish, you were blinded...

i will remember that day, that night...
until now, it will remain the worst day in my life...
20.08.09
i seek no more of such...

i deteste all of you ...
all of you,
whom looked at me with that stare...

listen here...
im not here to be judged nor bytch around...
just fcuking wake up and see it for YOURSELF...

ur all the same...
u said u love, and u knew love???
i say BULLSHYTE...

my tears will NEVER shed for YOU again...
u have my word...
till the day your body lay down into grave...
i will not shed not even a tear drop...
u have my word...

it rained and i cried along that night till the next night fall...

xx

21 dearest names for the dragon baby turning 21

due to a lil misunderstanding *jealousy to be exact*
i've came up with this lil post...
dedicated to all of the names that would be listed...
and most importantly,
eric,
ive sealed a lil something extra in it too...

1. Mdm. Ang Kim Eng ( my granny dearest - for givin birth to mummy dearest )
2. Peggy Ho ( my queen of my heart, mummy )
3. Johnny Yap ( my king of my heart, daddy greatest... )
4. Jason ( my one and only eldest brother whose coming to visit me soon ...)
5. Michelle ( my one and only sister whom i love play dress up and argue with... )
6. Johnson ( my brattiest lil brother whom enjoyssss sleeping and not showering )
7. ERIC HO ( my smartest cousin in terms of slyness during CNY open table...jkjk )
8. Magdalene ( my cousin sis that teaches me the fundamental needs of shopping )
9. Vivian Fong ( my lil xiao la jiao )
10. Dickson ( my chubbiest brainest lil cousin )
11. Elaine ( my lawyer-able cousin )
12. Johnathan ( my tall cousin whom has the cheekiest smile )
13. Eevonne ( my lil cousin sis whose forever hyper...)
14. Aunty Veronica ( my sweetest best aunty anyone could ever have )
15. Ricky ( my super uberly good kid cousin )
16. Richard ( my cousin whom carries the name richie rich )
17. Fiona ( my extremely huggable cousin )
18. Sherene ( my one and only dragon cousin sis )
19. Irene ( my very best photographer cousin )
20. Alex ( my naughtiest cousin )
21. Joel ( my smart Lil IT brainny cousin )

p/s : please do not be mad if Ur names aren't there...it doesn't mean you are not important nor neglected... its just the list is pretty unexplainable... sigh... Eric oh Eric, i think I've explained myself pretty clear eh...now all those unnamed ones might report to their mum n dad, and my red packet for next year might be limited...

- granny -
the best granny ever... i present to her the ultimate granny award !!! love love love...

-mummy-
she's definitely more than a superwoman in my life... thanks to her and daddy i have life...

-daddy-
he's more than my superman =) ... the sportiest, heaviest, roundest, bestest daddy in the world

- bro and sis -
* smiles broadly *

-eric-
teaches us a theory in life... no worries, just laugh even tho ur having a bad hand in poker...and when it comes to exam...leave the examination hall once you have completed half the paper and confirm you have passed...lolx... highly ambitious dude... yes yes yes... and handsome as well...

handsome eh... * sneaks a cheeky laugh and runs off before he gets a chance to lay his hands on me and give me a good smacking *

-maggie-
she is the ultimate shopping sifu...not only that... she's like an elder sis to me =)

-xiao la jiao-
forever always my lil cousin sis whom i adore... bringing them out and teasing her with the word raisin... and watchin her study... its hillarious....

-dickson-
man... he's one smart brainy young chap... and also, the only cousin i went clubbing worrying about him being underage..lolx

i guess thats about it for this post =)

IM GOING HOME...summer NO good...besides the SALES...

oh oh...
ssshh..
my no 22. Lawrence chiew shesan ( my man )
* dont take my hopes and dreams away *

toodles
xoxo
marg

she's into him

my lil getaway...

miles across...
heart still remains with him...

those lil waves goodbye that were hard to give out ...
never would i want to re-do ...
now isn't the time to be fussy nor demanding ...
c'est la vie ...
i believe the time will come ...
i know it will, and is on its way ...
just that my patience isn't cooperating ...

but for what may come,
i'll wait ... just to be with you ...
cause i know you too want the same ...
that is,
to be with me...


































p/s : so jiwang ma post... lolx... anywayz... rome im coming... 13th... i think im having phobia of flying... yea... i dont THINK.... i actually am...

toodless
xoxo
marg

my durham get-away

as promised and as said...
i was away to Durham... - Newcastle , sunderland, supposing york and stockon...

lili was ma host...
she was a babe and superb host...
i was well fed like a princess...

met her during my trip to Egypt...
and here i am, in Durham now with her...
laughters filled the air we breathe wherever we went...
she's engaged!!! and will be having her wedding next year in da lian =)

love goes out to her on this post...

* chinatown is everywhere except notts *

* thats lili =) ma host ma girl *

* newcastle... saga sumtin ... lolx *




* im obsess with this harry potterish specs...lol *

* sunderland beach... ma first in the britz.... lovin it *





* huge ass sunderland crab *
- one each... need not fight -




* stalking along stockton *

* hate the hair... but its old durham road... that way... *


* butterfly world... i sure am one.... *



* how nice of margie to end this post with this pretty sight *

you know i love u all...
hugsss...

xoxo
marg